In all of my nearly 25 years, I had never cried in a movie. I had tried several times, when I felt I was close to crying in some sadder scenes, I tried to force tears, yet no tears rolled down my cheek. Until tonight.
Zach Braff's "Wish I Was Here" isn't particularly sad. In fact, it's quite funny. But the reality of being faced with the probability of abandoning your dreams hits close to home, so I found it particularly easy to connect with Braff's character.
Braff plays Aidan Bloom, a husband and a father of two whose family is struggling financially while he attempts to follow his dreams of becoming an actor, but has seen little more than one part in a commercial. All the while, his father stops paying for his grandchildren to go to a Jewish Private School due to financial and health complications in his own life. Aidan takes it upon himself to begin home schooling his children in an unconventional way, while also cleaning up his own life.
With the poor reviews this film has been getting, it makes me wonder. Perhaps I just saw this movie at the right time in my life, or perhaps most film critics are just so cynical, they hate movies that have the audacity to suggest that maybe instead of complaining and feeling sorry for ourselves, we should instead enjoy life as it happens.
"A film that tells us to enjoy life? This is one critic
who wishes he wasn't here." -Cynical Critic, because that's
the stupid shit they say.
This movie is probably not for everyone, and I won't be surprised if a lot of you don't like it or just think that it's OK. But in my non-professional opinion, it was pretty damn good…
Sometimes, writing movie reviews for free every time I see a new movie (at least 4 times a week… at least) is tiring. It becomes a chore that I feel I need a long break from so I can enjoy movies without worrying about what I'll say while watching it. And then, there comes a movie that I just have to share with everyone I know, and that kicks my review writing back into overdrive.
"Europa Report" was that movie this time.
"But, Mike--" you ask, "why did you decide to do it for a movie extremely similar to 'Gravity', but not do 'Gravity' itself? It was awesome!"
Well I'll tell you, random reader! Everyone and their Grandmother's saw "Gravity". And deservedly so. That was a fantastic film. Probably one of the best this year. And anyone who disagrees wasn't paying attention. But "Gravity" didn't need my help to bring it viewers. It has been going strong in theaters. "Europa Report", for one, is out of theaters. And two, very few people saw it. So if I can introduce even one person to it through this blog, I feel I would have done my job.
"Europa Report" isn't your average "found footage" film. It is done through the style of a documentary about a privately funded mission to land on Jupiter's moon Europa and try to find life. Unlike most films like this, it isn't in it for the cheap scares and thrills.
"Europa Report" is filled with emotion and character development that attaches you to the characters you are introduced to and makes you feel for them in every single way. And no character does a better job at this than James Corrigan played by the vastly underrated, Sharlto Copley ("District 9", "Elysium"). With the film opening with Copley's character recording a message for his family, you immediately feel his home-sickness which adds to the feeling of claustrophobia.
Seeing someone in an Astronaut suit gives me anxiety,
even when they're still inside the ship.
Contrary to the trailer, I wouldn't consider this film a horror film, but rather a Sci-Fi thriller. Nothing really horrifying happens, but there is a lot of suspense and a lot of emotion throughout. To everyone that complains that there is nothing to watch on Netflix, open your eyes. There are plenty of hidden gems like this throughout their instant-watch inventory.
Wow. APparently this is the first Saudi Arabian film, and it's directed by a woman. That's awesome. It's great seeing film spread over the world, and I had no idea Saudi Arabia had never made a film before. This looks like an awesome movie.
BEARS (4/18/14)
AAAWWWWWWWW!!!!!! They're little killers!!! They're so cute! :D
AUGUST: OSAGE COUNTY (12/25/13)
Why has Meryl Streep only been playing bitches lately. It makes me hate her. And Benedict Cumberbatch is reason enough for me to want to see this. Other than him, I don't really have any desire to see it.
ROMEO & JULIET (10/11/13)
Other than role my eyes when I first heard they were making yet ANOTHER adaptation of Romeo and Juliet, I first thought "I wonder how romantic it really would have been before deodorant".
100 BLOODY ACRES (6/28/13)
If you know me, you know I love dark comedies. "Tucker and Dale VS. Evil" is one of the funniest movies ever made in my opinion. And this looks very similar to it. I can't wait to watch it! I wish I had known about it 2 months ago so I could have tried to see it in Philly!
After I saw "District 9", I had a slight obsession with Neill Blomkamp. I thought he showed great promise as a director and I couldn't wait for his next movie. Needless to say, I was extremely excited when I heard about "Elysium". Then I heard that Eminem was a possibility for the main role. As far as rapper-actors go, Eminem isn't terrible, but seriously? Eminem? Luckily he refused to be in the movie if they couldn't film in Detroit and Matt Damon got the role.
"Elysium" takes place in a futuristic world in which all of Earth is devastated from overpopulation and everywhere looks like the slums of Mumbai. The rich leave the planet to live on a space station called Elysium (OOOOOOH, That's why it's called that!) to obtain their way of life. Thus creating a not-so-subtle metaphor for the failed "Occupy Wall Street" movement.
1% of the People have 100% of the free Healthcare not
performed by a guy with tattoos or robots. I am the 99%!!!
Max finds himself pumped with radiation in an accident at his work and is only given 5 days to live. He sets off on a mission to get up to Elysium to use one of their Medical Bays, a machine that can fix any ailment just by spinning around you. Modern Medicine has it all wrong! No Pills! Just have a Machine spin around you to fix cancer, AIDs and Whooping Cough!!!
The only thing it doesn't fix is bad ADR (Automated Dialogue Replacement)
As high as my expectations were for this movie, I was only slightly disappointed. It was still a great movie. Better than a lot of the crap out there this summer. And none of my problems were with the story. It was all with the Audio. There were a lot of scenes where they had ADR, which to most people, is unnoticeable. But thanks to Film School, I don't have the privilege to ignore it anymore. Jodie Foster in particular had a lot of ADR. I've heard a lot of people say she was bad in this movie, but what I think people are confusing with bad acting is the bad ADR. But you can't notice something that you're unaware of. She wasn't terrible, just her audio was.
Sharlto Copley returned to Neill Blomkamp's set, but this time as a villain. And he was quite awesome as usual. He was evil, bad ass and funny all at the same time. This guy impresses me with every movie he's in and I'm glad he's getting the recognition and work he deserves.
"Elysium", although not as good as I had hoped, was a fun and thrilling movie that was more original than any other summer movie other there this year. More movies need to do that. As safe as reboots of old Western TV shows from the late 1940s may seem, (I'm looking at you Disney!), people will never appreciate remakes as much as they do originality. And that's not bashing all remakes. There are some phenominal remakes out there. It's just fact. Originality trumps remakes 10 out of 10 times.
Although, "Elysium" could be a rip-off of some obscure sci-fi movie that only 3 people have ever heard of and I could sound like a complete idiot to them right now.
Hello there. Have you missed me? I sure have missed you!
HER (11/20/13)
Wow. I dig this trailer. I dig it a lot. It looks fantastic. Joaquin Phoenix looks like he brought his 'A' game as usual, as well as Spike Jonze. It looks like a very interesting concept as well. This just went up on my top ten most anticipated movies for the rest of the year.
PHILOMENA (11/1/13)
DAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMME Judi Dench... That's all I have to say about this. Looks good.
THE MONUMENT MEN (12/18/13)
George Clooney, Matt Damon, John Goodman, Bill Murray... what more do you need? This looks like a different kind of War movie and it looks interesting. Can't wait to see it.
CBGB (10/11/13)
A movie about Rock 'n' Roll's most infamous club with the most infamous toilet. Starring Alan Rickman and a slew of other celebrities, this seems like it's going to be a fun movie.
ENOUGH SAID (9/20/13)
This is James Gandolfini's second to last movie. It's such a shame when actors die before they are able to see their work. He will be missed.
ALL IS LOST (10/18/13)
A lot of people don't like movies where there is only one character with nothing but his thoughts for the majority of the film. I personally love them. It's one of the best ways to see who that character really is, and see how he or she thinks. I can't wait to see this one.
MAGIC MAGIC (8/28/13)
I'm glad to see Michael Cera doing something different. He looks creepy as hell in this movie. Although, I don't have much hope for the movie as a whole.
AMERICAN HUSTLE (12/25/13)
In David O. Russell's follow up to "Silver Linings Playbook" he brings back Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence as well as Christian Bale and Amy Adams from his film "The Fighter". It looks very different from "Silver Linings Playbook", but it looks equally as good.
LONE SURVIVOR (1/10/14)
This has a lot of actors I love in it. I'm a little skeptical about a January release which to normal people sounds like crazy talk, but trust me. Bad movies come out in January for the most part, but I think this could be the exception of next year.
THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY (12/25/13)
People are freaking about this because they think Ben Stiller is trying to out do Danny Kaye, which is completely ridiculous. The two movies, although based from the same short story, look completely different. Ben Stiller is one of the most underrated Actor/Directors out there. He has such diversity in his work. He's done ridiculous comedies with "The Cable Guy" "Zoolander" and "Tropic Thunder". He's done action movies. He's done quirky comedies like "Greenburg" and now he's making what seems to be a deep, thoughtout drama about a man who wants more with his life. Even if this ends up being a disappointment, I have so much respect for him trying. This is my most anticipated movie of this year.
A lot of people wanted to see this movie to see Jennifer Aniston strip. I wanted to see it to see the white kid rap! And some RON SWANSON!!!
You can gather what "We're the Millers" is about from the trailer. It is a raunchy comedy following a drug dealer, a stripper, a homeless girl and a super dooper white kid on a major drug smuggling mission. Hilarity inn sues. Especially when Ron F***ing Swanson shows up!
Honestly, I thought this would be one of those movies where all of the funny parts are in the trailer. And apart from Nick Offerman and Will Poulter (White kid, "Son of Ranbow"), I'm not a huge fan of anyone in this movie. But it exceeded my expectations.
I'm gonna take this moment to ask a question. Do I seem like a broken record. I feel like I say the same stuff for every movie. Perhaps I just have a smaller vocabulary than previously thought, but I just don't know how else to describe these movies. Oh, well.
Anyway, this movie had me laughing throughout and even pumping my fist in celebration at some moments. Not many movies can do that.
Go see it. Or else... Nothing will happen, but still, go see it.
I just found at that Matthew Lillard from "SLC Punk" and "Scooby-Doo" directed this movie... awesome!
"Fat Kid Rules the World" begins with Troy trying to throw himself in front of a bus. But when he is saved by Marcus, his life starts to change. Marcus inspires (or forces depending on how you look at it) troy to learn how to play the drums and join a band, which gives Troy something to live for.
Once again, this is a movie I stumbled upon on Netflix instant watch, and I was not disappointed. Jacob Wysocki of Bath Boys Comedy infamy stars in the leading role. It impresses me that he can go from this...
...to movies like this and "Terri" which have more dramatic elements to them. I think he is definitely someone to look out for for years to come.
My Grade: B
Holy Crap this is based on a book?! I keep learning stuff, man!
Eventually, he learns to love these people and he finds what caused them to turn to eastern Gurus and decides to try to help them realize what he already know. That they do not need a Guru, they just need themselves.
This is a great documentary with a great message and does a great job of not bashing any personal reliefs. Rather it shows the viewer that you do not need to define yourself by your religion and your beliefs, but that you can be whoever you want to be.
If you don't have anything to do right now, go watch it. It's worth it.
There is a reason independent films are often better than big budget Hollywood movies. And that's because they don't have a thousand hands throwing garlic into the cake batter. Did you like that metaphor? I came up with it myself. Go me!
I'm just gonna go out and say it. Steve Carell is a major dick in this movie. Like, the worst person ever. I would punch him in the face if he were real and I saw him talking to his girlfriends kid like that. What the hell, Steve?! What the hell! I guess he did a good job if he made me hate him so much. And I love Steve Carell! So, in that case, well played good sir.
"The Way Way Back" is the directorial debut for Nat Faxon and Jim Rash, the Academy Award winning writers of "The Descendants". You may recognize them from this photo.
Nat's on the left and Jim is on the right striking his best
Angelina pose.
"The Way Way Back" is a heartfelt coming-of-age story about a teenager, named Duncan dealing with the divorce of his parents while on a vacation with his Mom and her dick of a new boyfriend... Did I mention he was a dick?
Anyway, he finds his solace and comes out of his shell when he lands a job at the local water park run by Owen, the laid back owner played by Sam Rockwell. Owen helps Duncan come out of his shell by basically forcing him to break dance with a lot of intimidating B-boy-ers... Is that a thing? Break dancing community, correct me if I'm wrong. Please! I'm terribly, terribly white and the only dances I know are the Chicken Dance and the electric sliding part of the electric slide.
What the hell?
With his new found confidence, Duncan starts hanging out with his summer neighbor's daughter, Susanna. The two of them bond over how immature their parents are acting and are basically the only sane people in the movie outside of the water park.
"The Way Way Back" is a good, heartfelt movie with a message that could help any awkward teenager. And believe me, Duncan is more awkward than most. Go see for yourself.
I've missed you. I hope you've missed me too. Let's never fight again.
"RED 2" starts off with our favorite retired agent and his new, young girlfriend shopping at Costco trying to lay low. But I think we all know how that works out. They are yet again, dragged into something they don't particularly want to be involved with. And as always, they're joined by their lovable, insane friend, whom regardless of what character he's playing, I refer to as John Malkovich from "Being John Malkovich".
Unfortunately, this time sans pig.
"RED 2" is exactly what you'd expect from a sequel to it's predecessor. It's fun, it's action packed and it's got a lot of memorable moments. However, this one didn't come with the element of pleasant surprise that the first one did. At least for me. It's a great film with a lot of funny and quotable lines, but I feel it quite do the first one justice.
But what sequel really does do the first one justice. Besides "X-Men 2". And "The Dark Knight". And "Terminator 2". And "Star Wars: Episode IV". And I would say "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers", but I consider them to be one long-ass movie.
What I'm trying to say is, if you enjoyed the first one, you'll enjoy this one...
Here's John Malkovich with a bomb strapped to his chest.
South Korean films are a lot of things, but if I had to narrow them down to two, it would be f'ed up and insanely good! Perhaps that's just the films that were popular enough to be shown over seas, but that's how I see them for now. And one man stands in the forefront of the f'ed up and insanely good category. "Oldboy" director Chan-wook Park. And his first English speaking film continues with that pattern for the most part.
Wow, what? Opening a trailer with something so intense is simply perfect! There is no beating around the bush here. They are telling you exactly what this movie will be like from the very beginning. "Stoker" tells the story of a teenage girl named India, who's father dies on her 18th birthday. At the funeral, her Uncle whom she'd never met until that day shows up and stays at their house for a while. Things, while already creepy from the first shot of the movie, begin to get creepier as India's mother begins finding herself infatuated with the devilishly handsome Uncle (not on her side of course).
This is one of those movies that reward the patient viewers. While it keeps you tied in from the opening shot with it's spectacular cinematography, the story slowly reveals what is going on and is often times confusing. But it all comes full circle in the end.
I love movies that do that. I forget who said it, and a quick Google search didn't help me at all, if you know who said it, comment below, it could have been Hitchcock, but I heard a saying that went "suspense isn't about what you show the audience. Suspense is about what you don't show them". That is the perfect way to describe this movie. Throughout the entire film, it seems as if they are showing you meaningless information, but for the patient viewers that stick around, everything becomes oh so clear and oh so fantastic.
I was expecting Dr. Manhattan to appear throughout most
of the movie, but he didn't. Mind Blown!
This is definitely the kind of movie you have to watch again to see what you've missed. I've only watched it once, but I'm sure I've missed a lot of information and hints. Things that could have been hidden in the music and sound effects that I missed because I was watching it at 4 AM on very quiet with subtitles because everyone was asleep. I really need to move out of my parents house.
Everyone in this movie was so intense, and so great. Matthew Goode was especially Goode (Yeah, I did it!). He was the perfect blend of creepy and charming. But look at that face. The latter wasn't hard for him at all, was it?
My Grade right now: B+. It could go up the more times I watch it. Great movie.
Also, do yourself a favor and watch the original "Oldboy" before that stupid Spike Lee version comes out.
I had some friends who were lucky enough to work on this movie. Unfortunately, they didn't receive credits, but it must have been a hell of an experience. Also, unfortunately, this film has been receiving bad reviews. People are too cynical these days.
Starring Armie Hammer and Johnny Depp, "The Lone Ranger" is a retelling of the old TV show from the '50s. It is about an masked Texas Ranger who partners up with a Native American to fight justice. It's a pretty cut and dry plot, but Gore Verbinski makes it entertaining.
For some reason, this only has a 26% on Rotten Tomatoes. This brings me to my rant section of the blog.
I don't like Rotten Tomatoes system at all because the critics can only choose "Approve" or "don't Approve". Given them two choices will not necessarily define what they thought of the movie. Take for instance my opinion of "The Purge". Did I like it? No. Would I recommend it to a friend? No. Do I think it's better than the 38% that rotten tomatoes gives it? Yes. I think, if we're talking percentages like it's a grade, I would say it was a 52%. For a movie to be fairly critiqued and rated, you need at least a system of 1 to 5.
Anyway, I digress. This movie was quite enjoyable. That doesn't mean I thought it was good. There is a difference between enjoyabl-ity (shut up) and quality. There was a time when I would have said this movie was stupid because it wasn't deep or meaningful. But that's when I was in my movie hipster days. All hipsters and cynics are just immature people who haven't grown up enough to realize you can enjoy the stupid things from time to time. Not everything needs to be philosophical. Some things can just have action sequences that defy the laws of physics.
Now, brings me to my hypocritical point in the blog. Historical Inaccuracies! That is one thing that is unforgivable in my mind. In this movie, they sang "The Star Spangled Banner" as the national anthem in 1868. "The Star Spangled Banner" wasn't adopted as the National Anthem until 1931. It's earliest recognition as a national song was by the U.S. Navy in 1889, 21 years after this movie takes place!
Also, Johnny Depp isn't Native American... but who cares?
What does all my ranting and going off topic mean? It means people shouldn't be so critical. If you legitimately hated this movie, I understand. But to give it a low rating just because it wasn't "The Godfather" or "Gone With the Wind" is just silly. I hate how cynical this world has become.
I think it's safe to say that the reason the first "Despicable Me" was so popular was because of the minions. The hundreds of little yellow three stooges-esque guys had some of the funniest parts in the last one, and I think the studio got the message. They were a lot more prominent this time around.
In this hilarious sequel, Gru is hired by the Anti-Villain League to find out who has stolen a serum from a lab in Antarctica... actually the whole lab, not just the serum. The serum changes cute, little things into giant, coked out purple monsters! Kind of like if the Incredible Hulk and a crack-head had a child together. Gru sets up surveillance in the local mall and hunts down the villain all while trying to raise his newly adopted daughters, all the while, the minions start to disappear!
They did what to Kevin?!
As with the first one, the real selling points of this movie are the minions. Every scene they have is hilarious and even overshadows Agnes' adorableness. They sing songs on multiple occasions and there is even a cameo of Boyz 2 Minions.
It's been a while since I've seen the first one, but everything I remember about it had to do with the minions. But I can't be sure which one is better.
Honestly, they should drop the whole act with Gru and the girls and just make a movie about the minions. I'd pay to see that. And I don't have to pay.
Overall, this was a fun movie. Anyone who saw this, did you notice the "World War Z" nod towards the end? Or am I crazy?
Roland Emmerich can't seem to make an original movie. First it was "Deep Impact" being released the same year as "Armageddon", now "White House Down" is released the same year as "Olympus Has Fallen"...
OK, maybe it's only two examples, but still! And each of his movies have been worse than the other ones.
One word of advice, Roland? STAHP!!!!
OK, so we I feel as though I don't need to tell you what a movie as creatively named as "White House Down" is about, so I will just move on. The one thing that made "Olympus Has Fallen" great was that it didn't take itself too seriously. It knew it was a mindless action movie and didn't try to be anything else. "White House Down" forced political opinions in the opening 5 minutes. Granted, they are opinions that I agree with, but nothing bugs me more than a movie trying to mean more than it is.
No one is going to look at "White House Down" and think "Gee, I sure learned a lot about the War in Iraq and Afghanistan today! I'm going to volunteer at my favorite candidates campaign head quarters! Golly!" They're gonna look at the first hour of the film and say "Where the Hell are the explosions?! 'Olypmus Has Fallen' had killed like a hundreds guys by this point!". Stop trying to be something you aren't, Roland!
How can you root for someone who goes for a job interview
in the President's Secret Service with their tie tied like that. My tie looked better
at my first middle school dance! COME ON CHANNING!
In this, Jamie Foxx's character "The Leader of the Free World/The President of the United States" about a million times, presumably following it with "Woah, woah, woah". I don't know, I stopped paying attention. But, I highly doubt the President ever refers to himself as those things in any situation other than introducing himself to someone who just came out from under a rock, let alone in the privacy of his helicopter to his Press Secretary or whatever the heck Maggie Gyllenhaal was supposed to be.
There were only three things I like about this movie. Jason Clarke, Jimmi Simpson and Richard Jenkins. It just wasn't good. It does however do a great job at showing how stupid the media is.
SPOLIER! But not really, because I'm just saving you 2 hours of your life, 1 of which doesn't even have explosions in it.
If a girl is brave enough to post a video onto Youtube of her captors, DO NOT show her picture on-air when she is still in captivity... If the captors are smart enough to take over the White House, they're smart enough to be watching the news while they do so to see what's being said about them and the situation. The media is and always will be filled with idiots.
I am very excited about this Trailer Tuesday for one reason...
THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG 12/13/13
I don't know about you, my faithful four readers, but I had to change my pants twelve times in those two minutes. This is already looking better than the first one, and that one was awesome! We got Lee Pace!!! I've loved him ever since "Pushing Daisys" short life on TV. Also, does anyone else agree that Martin Freeman is the perfect Bilbo? I can't wait for this movie!
THE FAMILY 9/20/13
This looks promising. Robert De Niro, Michelle Pfeiffer and Tommy Lee Jones are all great actors, and this is an interesting concept for a comedy. And Luc Besson knows how to make a movie. I think this could be good.
INSIDIOUS 2 9/13/13
Ray Brown, if you're reading this, after you're done changing your pants, answer this. Didn't his body get overtaken by a ghost at the end of the first one? Or am I mistaken? I'm not nearly as excited about this as you are, but I still want to see it. Could be good, could be terrible, could be alright.
PARANOIA 8/16/13
I love Harrison Ford. I love Gary Oldman even more. Liam Hemsworth and Amber Heard, I'm not so crazy about. This is a movie that the older experienced actors have me excited but the younger actors in it still have something to prove to me. Who knows, maybe they will with this one.
SCENIC ROUTE (2013)
This is not a good trailer. I don't think it'll surprise me when I go see it either. I just don't expect this movie to be good. But I like Dan Fogler, so I will see it regardless of my ridiculously low expectations.
THE BLING RING 6/21/13
This movies just seems like it'd annoy me. The only promising in this for me is Emma Watson, but I don't think even looking at her for 90 minutes can save this movie for me.
KEVIN HART: LET ME EXPLAIN 7/3/13
If anyone deserves their success it's Kevin Hart. He seems like such a genuine person and always seems nice to people. He even deals with TMZ's BS in a polite manner. I'm looking forward to this!
KICK-ASS 2 8/16/13
I really liked the first "Kick-Ass". But something about this one just bugs me. I'll still go see it, but I think this is a one-and-done kind of movies. I don't think it needs sequels. But we'll see! I could be very wrong!
AS I LAY DYING (TBA)
Directed by James Franco, this is based on the book by the same name. I read that book a long time a go, so I might have forgotten some things, but I don't remember anything interesting happening throughout the whole thing. Again, this was about 8 years ago so who knows. I love all of the actor in this, but the only questionable one is Danny McBride. I don't think I could take him seriously in anything. But we shall see.
PLANES 8/9/13
Go home, Disney! You're drunk!
Tune in next Tuesday for more trailers!!!! #trailertuesday #moviemochilla
I've always felt that The Great Gatsby was one of those books that people said they liked so they couldn't be accused of being stupid. Don't get me wrong, it's beautifully written. F. Scott Fitzgerald is a great writer. There's a reason people today know his name. But I always felt that The Great Gatsby was extremely overrated. It's just not that good of a story, in my opinion. When I read it, the immaturity of everyone in it drove me insane. Especially Daisy. She is just genuinely a terrible person.
There are a few things in stories that drive me crazy. And one of them is immature people. Now, I'm not talking about people who make fart jokes or get drunk all of the time. I'm talking about people who are selfish to the point where they act like children. Daisy is one of those characters. She takes the easy route for everything. I understand that that's the point, but it drives me crazy.
I want to punch her in the face and tell her, for lack of a better phrase, to man up! Take responsibility for your actions! Don't hide behind your horrible husband who is alright with cheating on you, but the second you cheat on him he accuses you of being a terrible person (She is, but not for that reason).
"I love Gatsby, but my husband was being a total
dick to him and he lost his temper, so now I
love my dick of a husband again. And I'm gonna let Gatsby
take the blame for something I did that could have easily been
resolved, because I'm more important than anyone else!"
And when you hit someone with a car, stop! It's that easy! Especially when the car you were driving is as recognizable as Gatsby's Yellow CUSTOM MADE car! Even today, if you hit someone with your car, if you just stop and wait for police, if it was a genuine accident, you will not go to jail. You might have to pay fines, but you will not go to jail if it was a genuine accident that could not have been avoided.
The other thing that drives me crazy in stories is when there are little to no characters that are possible to connect to. Even a good villain should have a characteristic that you could identify with. In "The Great Gatsby", Daisy is a lying skank who flip-flops with what she wants, Tom Buchanan is a cheating chauvinist hypocrite, and Jordan is an emotionless drone and Nick Carraway is a follower that never does anything for himself. The only two characters I could begin to connect with are George Wilson and Jay Gatsby. Both were motivated by love and would do anything for it.
Anyway, that's my rant about the story. Cinematically, this film was brilliant. As always with Baz Luhrmann films, it had a very elegant, theatrical feel to it. Beautifully shot, with great set and costume design. But that's to be expected.
I did get tired of the modern songs throughout. Some fit really well, others just stuck out like a sore thumb. It wasn't as seamless as "Moulin Rouge" was.
The editing was iffy, there were so many parts in long shots where the mouths didn't match up with the dialogue, and it happened way more than it normally does.
While watching this, I created a little drinking game. I don't drink, but you all can enjoy it.
Take a shot of Tequila every time Gatsby calls someone "Ol' Sport" (Don't really... you will die.. maybe just take a sip of beer. You'll still be hammered in no time)
Take a shot every time Daisy lies.
Chug a beer anytime Tom Buchanan gets angry at someone for doing something he always does.
Whenever Nick Caraway does something someone else tells him to do, last person to say "bitch" downs their beer.
I love you, Ol' Sport. You're a beautiful Ol' Sport,
Ol' Sport.
It's in the works, but I'm sure it can turn into something great.
It is every young boys dream to befriend a fugitive on the run and help him reunite with the love of his life... What? That's never happened to you? Man, you didn't have a childhood.
In undeniably the best performance of his career, Matthew McConaughey plays Mud, a name only a fugitive in the Southern United States would have. Wanted for murdering the abusive ex-boyfriend of the love of his life, he lays low on an island in the middle of a river. A boat stuck in a tree draws two teenage boys to the area, where they meet Mud. and befriend him.
Written and Directed by Jeff Nichols, director of "Take Shelter", "Mud" is an intense coming-of-age story that is unlike any other I have ever seen. It is one of those films that the location is much like a character in itself, much like "Take Shelter".
"Mud" is not your typical spring movie. It has more of a fall season movie feel to it (Trust me, it's a thing). But it is one of the best movies I have seen this year. I know, I say that a lot, but it's true!
Warning: If you have seen the movie "Moon" this review will contain spoilers for "Oblivion" and visa versa.
In "Oblivion", the world has been destroyed in a war with an alien species. The humans won the war but were forced to evacuate the planet and find refuge on on of Saturn's moons. Tom Cruise, being the bad-ass he thinks he is , works on Earth fixing drones that take protect giant machines that convert Earths water into energy.
But nothing is as it seems. Tom Cruise is actually a clone tricked into thinking he is a human to give him the motivation to do his slave work. He only has two weeks left on his contract, and since he is a clone, instead of going home, he will be exterminated and replaced by a new clone. Hmm... sounds familiar...
OK, "Oblivion" does have some differences from "Moon". In "Oblivion", instead of humans controlling the clones, it's an Alien, triangle, pyramid thingy. (What?)
If we had made it round, it would have looked like the
Death Star and people would have known
this movie wasn't original.
"Oblivion" was enjoyable, but the main problem with is is that I just kept think of how much better "Moon" was. And that was very distracting. It's kind of like seeing a Led Zeppelin cover band. It's good, but you know what you really want.
At least I got to look at Olga Kurylenko for two hours.... MMM!
Through the history of horror films, somewhere along the way the word "terrifying" has had it's meaning changed from "to fill with fear or alarm" to "bucket and buckets of blood". Because of that, the remake of the 1981 cult classic "The Evil Dead" has been deemed "The Most Terrifying Movie Ever Made". Even with the new meaning, that critic must not have seen "Dead Alive".
Dropping the "The" from the title, "Evil Dead" is an "edgier" and "more terrifying" version of the 1981 film. It's "ground-breaking" style has paved a "new way" for the future of horror movies.
You might notice I used a lot of quotations in those two sentences. That is because the hype around this movie is all for not. There is nothing new or groundbreaking about this movie. It is the same gore-porn that we have all come to know and tolerate (or detest) since it became the norm when they installed the ratings system.
Now, that's not to say this movie is terrible. It's not. It's entertaining. But there is nothing to special about it at all. The acting isn't good. The writing is sub par. The special effects are on par with modern horror movies. But it's all so very predictable. And no, that's not because it's a remake. If I remember correctly, its actually quite different from the original if you forget about the tree-raping, basement prisoner that possesses the young lady, and the book of the dead and what not. Granted it''s been over half a decade since I last saw the original.
I know, I hate Mondays too.
What's really impressive is that director Fefe Alvarez got the job as director by making a youtube video. in his home country of Uruguay. And being made for only $300, it's pretty good.
Instead of getting fined for using copy written music,
he gets a Directing contract.... jerk.
Anyway, "Evil Dead" is what it is... a gory, horror film. If you want to see something like that, you'll like it, or at least enjoy it. If you don't want to see something like that, don't see it.
Ah, nothing is better than going to see a movie and being the only one in the theater. Maybe it's just me, but it makes me feel special, even though it has happened to me a lot, working at a theatre and what not. Comedies, however, usually don't seem as funny when you're the only one watching. The crowd's laughter really adds to the experience. That being said, the lack of a crowd didn't affect how much I laughed at "The Incredible Burt Wonderstone".
"The Incredible Burt Wonderstone" is about two best friends (Steve Carrel and Steve Buscemi) who essentially become Siegfried & Roy minus the tigers. They become one of the most popular acts on the Las Vegas strip, but soon find out sticking with the same routine will make you fade into nothingness. A threat in the form of street magician, Steve Grey (Jim Carrey) causes rifts in their relationship, forcing them to part ways.
Maybe, it is the thoughts of my good friend The Amazing Ray Brown (who is not a pedophile) that made this funny. But I think this was just a legitimately humorous movie. All of the actors and the editing had great timing. The situations were very funny, and the references to the magic industry set it over the edge. Especially in the subject of street magic.
Less ridiculous than Chris Angel.
This is a fun and clever movie that I feel people from all ages will be able to enjoy. Granted, no movie is for everyone, and this probably isn't even for most people. But I found it to be extremely entertaining and funny. If you are looking for a comedy, check out "The Incredible Burt Wonderstone". The worst that could happen is that you don't like it. Plus it's got Olivia Wilde. Who doesn't like Olivia Wilde?
How could you stay ma at her for stealing your watch?
