Movie Mochilla: Olympus Has Fallen

Monday, July 8, 2013

White House Down: Or Olympus Has Fallen Take 2 But This Time Make A Point to Shove Roland Emmerich's Political Opinions In Everyone's Face

Roland Emmerich can't seem to make an original movie. First it was "Deep Impact" being released the same year as "Armageddon", now "White House Down" is released the same year as "Olympus Has Fallen"...

OK, maybe it's only two examples, but still! And each of his movies have been worse than the other ones.

One word of advice, Roland? STAHP!!!!

OK, so we I feel as though I don't need to tell you what a movie as creatively named as "White House Down" is about, so I will just move on. The one thing that made "Olympus Has Fallen" great was that it didn't take itself too seriously. It knew it was a mindless action movie and didn't try to be anything else. "White House Down" forced political opinions in the opening 5 minutes. Granted, they are opinions that I agree with, but nothing bugs me more than a movie trying to mean more than it is.

No one is going to look at "White House Down" and think "Gee, I sure learned a lot about the War in Iraq and Afghanistan today! I'm going to volunteer at my favorite candidates campaign head quarters! Golly!" They're gonna look at the first hour of the film and say "Where the Hell are the explosions?! 'Olypmus Has Fallen' had killed like a hundreds guys by this point!". Stop trying to be something you aren't, Roland!

How can you root for someone who goes for a job interview

in the President's Secret Service with their tie tied like that. My tie looked better

at my first middle school dance! COME ON CHANNING!

In this, Jamie Foxx's character "The Leader of the Free World/The President of the United States" about a million times, presumably following it with "Woah, woah, woah". I don't know, I stopped paying attention. But, I highly doubt the President ever refers to himself as those things in any situation other than introducing himself to someone who just came out from under a rock, let alone in the privacy of his helicopter to his Press Secretary or whatever the heck Maggie Gyllenhaal was supposed to be.

There were only three things I like about this movie. Jason Clarke, Jimmi Simpson and Richard Jenkins. It just wasn't good. It does however do a great job at showing how stupid the media is.

SPOLIER! But not really, because I'm just saving you 2 hours of your life, 1 of which doesn't even have explosions in it.

If a girl is brave enough to post a video onto Youtube of her captors, DO NOT show her picture on-air when she is still in captivity... If the captors are smart enough to take over the White House, they're smart enough to be watching the news while they do so to see what's being said about them and the situation. The media is and always will be filled with idiots.

My Grade: C-

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Olympus Has Fallen

I wish they'd change this title to "'MURICA". This is also why I'm not a producer.

My experience watching this was not the best. That's not to say this movie wasn't enjoyable. However, there was a man who sat in the same row as me who was not enjoyable. Let me break it down for you using the rules and etiquette of viewing a movie in public.

Do not talk during the presentation, unless of course it is a Tyler Perry movie or any other movie where the main demographic is African-Americans.
If you're coughing excessively and it sounds like you might need an ambulance or at least to quit smoking, please exit the theatre and receive a full cash refund at the box office. Seriously, no one wants to hear what's in your throat.
Laughing when people are dying in something that is not a comedy is generally just not a good idea. It makes people around you think you are a serial killer. But if you're a serial killer, by all means, laugh on.
It's one thing to whisper jokes to your friends during the movie, but if you are alone... you're a bastard and I hate you.

Now that I got that off my chest...

"Olympus Has Fallen" is about a man who works for the Secret Service. He is taken off of Presidential Detail when the First Lady dies while he is on the job. When the White House is overrun by terrorists, he finds himself the only man alive inside the White House and has to take on an army single handedly.

"MURICAN chaos ensues.